Something Terrible Has Happened That sound you just heard was me breaking the fourth wall. We need you all to understand something crucial. It's been touched on before but I'm putting this here so that it's clear. THIS IS NOT REAL The department is a creation of Cutty and I, based upon ideas and dreams … Continue reading Something Terrible Has Happened
By now everyone probably knows about the Russian Meteor. Many of you will have heard of the Cuban Meteor, or the claims thereof. There's been a lot of talk about the Tunguska event. Officially the Department cannot comment. We didn't do it, it didn't pass through British airspace and we had no personnel on the ground. As far … Continue reading On Meteors and Butterflies.
Well yesterday was hectic. Let's see. The electric star gods invaded, landing their neon pyramid ships on crucial geomantic sites and re-energising the entire planetary grid. That brought the dead back as shambling zombies and triggered earthquakes, tsunami and the magnetic-poles to shift. The very fabric of space-time tore. A temporal infarction resulting in utter … Continue reading The Great Apocalypse of 2012
Unconfirmed reports of a dead yPhone are coming in. I should explain. yPhones are notoriously hard to brick. They're somewhat beyond the current state of technology and always look at least 1 generation ahead. But are... well the nature of the technology they use is beyond my pay grade. For the most part they behave just like … Continue reading yPhones
Story starts here. Ends here, right where you are. Cat was deported to Avalon where he will be incarcerated for the next two decades, a twinkling in the eye of for one of the Fae. Having been 'incarcerated' there myself for a few months it's not exactly a bad way to spend a score of … Continue reading And That’s A Wrap
Contents page. On the way back to the Landrover I briefed the man in black and called Detective Jayne and told her where to meet us. Chris missed it because he was trying to persuade the Runt to let him play with her ears. By the time he caught up with us the guns were … Continue reading And the killer is…
Index here. I don’t like being lied to. No-one does. Lying to the Department is another thing entirely. We object to it in the strongest terms. When the Department objects to things we don’t keep it to ourselves. Everybody gets a slice. Mycroft hacked into a satellite feed to check the camp was still there … Continue reading A Visit She Wont Much Like
To congratulate Agent Gideon for his MBE. "For services to film and media" my entire arse. We all know what it's really for; it's only the official secrets act that holds our tongue.
Just occasionally our cousins across the Atlantic cock up. Mostly they are the very soul of efficiency. In fact if the Department has one quarrel with them it's that they're too efficient, too controlled. So on the rare occasions that they make a mistake it's invariably hilarious. Ladies and gentlemen I give you this: Kidnapped Goat Returned … Continue reading Goatnapped
I recently found a boxed-up relic from another time. It had been shipped over from the Vaults Major because it was of no threat and they needed space for stuff that was. It is a decayed dome of what appeared to be a Blue Box Clique prop. I did some research and discovered it was … Continue reading Vaults Minor Case File 1 – Deadly Dome of Doom