Cutty’s a bit rushed off her feet with all the too-ing and throwing; or is that twoing and throughing? Anyhow. She asked me to fill in so I thought I’d share some of the excitement of my day with you instead.

I bumped into Dr [REDACTED] at the office today. He invited me out to lunch at The Clarence with Dr Promethean.

[REDACTED] still thought I was in the archives, which I am but not in the capacity I was before, so we talked a bit about Slender Falls, my promotion, and the relaxing atmosphere of the Vaults Minor. When Dr P. arrived, fashionable late as always, they started talking shop.

Seemed like some daft bint had mummified herself alive by overdosing on fake tanning lotion. Some sort of multipurpose cream that supposedly moisturised, tanned, varnished nails, the works from what I could make out. All sorts of, highly unlikely, claimed effects from a single product. I thought we had trading standards for that sort of thing, but it just goes to show. The things people do to themselves in the name of beauty.

After lunch, I indulged in a steak, the three of us cut a swathe through the streets of London until we found a stall in Covent Garden hawking the stuff. Yes my steps faltered a little as we approached Covent Garden. [REDACTED] gave me a funny look and I told him that I still have the nightmares, although thankfully infrequently.

Anyway the caramel coloured ladies running the stall flirted with Dr P., which is always a warning sign, and asked what lucky ladies we were buying for. However once the two doctors identified themselves as physicians the ladies started to give us the run around. So I flashed them my ID and told them to give us the facts. The second they slipped into the light trance that exposure to a department ID induces in the unprepared they both had what appeared to be epileptic seizures. The two doctors looked after them while I called in an ambulance. After they left we had some of the local boys in blue deliver the contents to HQ.

Dr P. and [REDACTED] were calling in Lord Westernra to help with the analysis as I slipped off back to the vaults. I must admit that I quite enjoyed the stroll.


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