The DRG part two

I’m visiting the DRG. Part one is here. If you’re confused about what’s going on this story starts here.

“So we started by looking at all the digital files you sent us but they were really boring. So we took a look for patterns in the scanned files but that was boring too. So then we thought that if the murderer was a co-worker there might be evidence of tampering her her files so we looked for that but that was even more boring. So then we had an idea.” Said Chris Elsewhere.

I heard Max muttering next to me, “Dear God.” He said.

Chris didn’t notice,”So we decided to build something to look for patterns in the Data. That was fun. We’ve come up with a clever little program to do the hard work for us.”

“How clever?” I said.

“Oh moderately bright. It’s not self aware yet or anything.” Said Chris.

“How little? Hey what do you mean yet?” Said Max.

“Don’t worry. We didn’t erase anything. Though we might have borrowed some extra storage space from a alternate dimension.” Said Chris.

“Borrowed?” Said Max.

At this point things might have degenerated into a domestic but the lab door was thrown open by a short heavily built man in an ill-fitting, sweat stained suit. “Who is responsible for this place. I want to see the man in charge.” He said.

Chris’s right hand went straight to his breast pocket and covered his name tag. “See Elsewhere.” Chorused the rest of the DRG in unison.

“Alright, alright. You don’t have to be weird about it. You could just say he’s not here.” Said the man and left. The door swung shut after him.

“So anyway this new program we’ve written for you.” Said Chris.

“Yes.” I said. Hoping that I could get out of there before Max remembered that he was pissed off with Chris.

“Well we took the model of the Home Office Major Large Enquiry System* that the Police use to collate all the information from big enquiries and we automated all the subsystems and added a very clever pattern seeking algorithm. We’re calling it Mycroft.” Said Chris.

“What does Mycroft Stand for?” Said Max.

“It doesn’t stand for anything. We just named it after Sherlock’s smarter brother.” Said Chris.

“But does it work?” I said.

“Well we’re still it the early stages of testing but we’ve certainly found something interesting.” Said Chris.

I waited for about a minute but he seemed disinclined to continue.

“And?” I said.

“Oh yes. The Results. Sorry. It’s still early and we may find more as we tweak Mycroft but we’re hopeful because it’s already done something quite clever. It’s found someone that wasn’t there.”

“Do you mean that it found a gap in a pattern or that it made stuff up?” I said.

“It found a gap. It found a distinct group of people who have never complained about the Dingo. In fact members of this group have complained about her coworkers and asked to be transfered to her.” Said Chris.

“You mean found a group of people who actually liked her? This I have to see.” Chris unfolded his yPhone to A4 size and passed it to me. I could not believe what I read. “Is this for real?” I said.

“Well the information is certainly accurate but whether it means anything is up to you.” Said Chris.

“I can’t wait to find out.” I said.


*HOLMES for short. It was replaced in 1994 by HOLMES2.


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